All Christians go through a period of wondering why things go bad for them when the world gets what it wants or when they pray and those they prayed for are helped. I have gone through it more times than I care to count. So we ask, why? I have come to realize that reasons vary.

One of the greatest stories to illustrate this question is the story of Job. After having everything, he lost it. The story goes through friends and his wife trying to give advice. His friends told him that it must be because he had unforgiven sin. His wife said to curse God and die. We all feel like Job at some point. Try to do what we should and still get the worst end of it.

The reason Job was harshly dealt with was through no fault of his own. In this instance, Satan wanted to prove to God that man would disavow Him if everything was taken from them. God allowed that trial to prove that there are people that would not deny God, no matter the trials they faced. (Job 1:6-12, Job 2:1-7)

Another view is that God allows His children to suffer, because what comes from it is better. Take Joseph, the son of Israel. Sold as a slave by his brother’s. (Genesis 37:12-36). Accused of rape by the wife of a high ranking official in Egypt (Genesis 39:7-20). Had Joseph not been allowed to suffer, Egypt and the family of Israel would have died from famine. (Genesis 41, Genesis 45:3-7).

Then there is the reason of chastisement (Hebrews 12:6-11). This can best be seen in the Babylonian exile. (Kings, Chronicles, the prophetical books). They moved away from God by idolatry and by foregoing the laws of a rest for the land every 7 years. They were taken by Nebuchadnezzar, a Babylonian king (who destroyed Solomon’s temple) and returned by the Persian king, Darius. (Ezra 6:1-22). The total of the time in exile from Israel was 70 years. This was to make up the time the land needed to be come usable again.

The one that is hardest to understand is when God says NO. In modern Christianity (especially the Evangelical and Prosperity movements), it is said that with enough prayer and faith, God will answer all your prayers and give you what you ask for. They take a simple set of verses out of it true understanding (John 16:23-24). If we ask for anything, it does not mean it will be given in all circumstances. Sometimes, the request goes against the edicts of God. Sometimes, the request is not what God wants for us. What is meant by the verses in John is simple. The request must fit within God’s plan and not be against the laws and dictates He has given.

Jesus asked for the coming crucifixion to be taken from him. (Matthew 26:39). He understood that God, the Father, knew best. God told him no. And he was crucified. The reason was that the unanswered prayer was the best decision for all of mankind.

In 2019, I ended up 49 and divorced. I went through the emotions and finally did what I had not done in 20 years. I hit my knees and cried out to God to fix my family. It was not to be answered the way I asked. Nineteen years early, I married and because of that, left the church and my faith. After the prayers and tears, and a re-dedication to God, I came to realize that the one thing that kept me from him needed removed. And that my prayers received a NO from God, because it was what was best for me. It took away the things that had been placed between me and him.

Just because things are going the way you think they should, or that God has said No or is delaying an answer, does not mean he has left you. Sometimes, bad happens for good reasons. It is to get us back on the right track, the devil is allowed to try and draw us away, or there is something better coming.

We can learn a couple lesson about how to deal with it. We can let it destroy us and turn from God’s grace and care. OR we can be like Jacob wrestle God. (Genesis 32:22-32) until our breakthrough and blessing comes.

Nobody said becoming a follower of Christ made life easier (except for the prosperity gospel preachers). Nor is that walk with God going to be fair (Matthew 5:45). But we can always be comforted no matter what the darkness seems like to us at the moment, that something better is coming (Psalm 30:5).

I saw this in a post somewhere and it fits this issue when you think God is not answering your prayer. I hope it helps.

5 Things to do when it feels like God isn’t listening

Check Your Heart (Psalm 24:3-4).

Check Your Motives (Matthew 6:10).

Check Your Focus (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Ask for a Belief Increase (Mark 9:24).

Keep Praying (Luke 18:1-8).